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Via Rafe, I compare myself against the Gawker blog-cliché list. Since I’ve been writing this weblog since 1998, many opportunities for self-petard-hoisting (is that one a cliché too?)

Update: Dan Lyke saw the list as well, and wonders why a celebrity-obsessed site like Gawker thinks they can preach about cliché-ridden writing.

Meanwhile, here’s all my sins remembered.

1. Best. [ultimate thing or experience.] Ever/Evar.

   Yes. A couple of times. You do realize I read comic books?

2. [undesirable counter-example], not so much.

   Gawker must be reading The Corner or something.

3. FTW, O RLY, lol, FTL, OMG, FWIW, btw, PWND, ROTFL, etc.

   Yes. I’ve used ‘OMG’ to talk about the online clip from Serenity. I am a Whedon fan.

4. [negative experience, situation, or description]; I just threw up a little bit in my mouth.

   If I did, I’ve kept that information to myself.

5. [purposefully non-ghetto statement], yo.

   Yes. Once. The other two times were the New Jersey-ian usage. I’ll go to online cultural appropriation diversion training.

6. [undesirable conclusion]. Oy.

   Oy.

7. [amazed paraphrase of opposing position]. Seriously? Seriously?

   That sounds more like a political blog trope to me.

8. What’s next? [outlandish scenario]?

   Nope. I do want that on a tshirt.

9. I’m looking at you, [example of complaint].

   I’ve managed to escape the cheap imitation of Denis Leary’s classic MTV ads.

   It’s a Colbert-ism as well. And I did use it.

10. Um, [condescension]?

    Um, yeah. [condescension].

11. [Argument], wait for it, [rhetorical flourish].

    Nope. Another political blog trope.

12. [Undesirable experience] made my [sensory organ] bleed.

    Nope.

13. [adjective]-y goodness

    Yes, I am a Whedonista. I’ve used it unrepentently. I am the Zeppo of blogging.

14. [any word]-gasm

    If I did, my friends would laugh at me, even if it was “ironically”.

15. [x] is the new [y].

    No, but I quote a NYT article that uses the phrase.